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Most annoying thing about playing fruits?


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#41 jamesb99_1999

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Posted 27 December 2007 - 09:12 PM

As Stan said, gambling profits are taxable - As I see it; unless the the tax is covered by the people you are taking the bet with you are liable. For example I noticed for the first time today a national lottery scratchcard (the birthday one) says you will receive £10,000 a year for the next 10 years - however you will be taxed on this at the prevailing rate (have a look at them it suprised me). But shit hard to prove.

I know people who make a decent living from machines, one always seems to be flush - but I also know he has really shit periods too.. Like all gamblers, however good.
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#42 Nudgeman

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 12:06 AM

Staff singing out of tune. Nosey people. Lousy coin mechs that reject nine out of ten coins. Beer that tastes like iron filings. Iron filings that taste of beer that tastes of iron filings. People leaning all over machines with loads of bags and hats and umbrellas and suitcases and you feel guilty asking them to move, so generally you don't bother even though it's a good machine you want to play. Low percentages, dodgy chips, you know you're getting ripped off. 'Random' machines. 'Randomly compensated' machines. Compensation claims by people who have been 'randomly' done over by 'compensated' machines. A Golden Game whereby you take a real bloop that looks like a fake bloop and realise it was a real bloop but as it's ten minutes to last credits you nudge in a bloop after hoping for a bloop but get a bloop and what's worse the bloop after bloop has disappeared and you've only got a few bloops to look forward to, as going back in is too risky due to time trouble but you know it could do a big bloop for £100s!! So you walk about even when you could have been so much more up. Completely blooped up! However you don't want to be bloop pounds in with work the next day and not able to hold the bloop for the morning as you'll be in work. If only you had an extra hour or bloop. Missing stuff under pressure. Sticky buttons. Sticky fingers. Acidic coin gunge that erodes the epidermis and leaves skin susceptible to staphlylococcal infections, so a yellow exudate weeps from between your fingers and you need some Fucidin cream to clear it up, so you go to the doctor get a prescription, go to the chemist, but Bencrest is in there and he's in a world of his own, so it takes an hour to get the cream by which time someone has emptied all your machines. Ignorant staff, flapping about when you've got Mega Streak in your box threatening to turn off the machine - LADBROKES!!! GUILTY!!! Around here anyway. Rechips. |Old chips. Chips with not enough vinegar. Strange chips. Bootleg chips. Bootlaces. Bootleg Beetles. Beetle Drives. Beetle films. Herbie flurby. Eeebie Jeebies. Weejie boards. Squeezy liquid bottles. Squeezy cheesy peas. Peas that are overcooked. They should be Al dente, which is a term that is probably only applicable to pasta, but I just applied it to peas. I think there is a more legume specific cooking terminology meaning a barely steamed vegetable, harder to the bite. Full of vitamins. Mushy peas is not where it is at. Tight mates who always skank you for an extra beer. Tight mates who expect free beer as you won £1.60 on your way in. Randoms who want a quid for them breathing on you. Random stoppas where the cancel button is broken. The council. Cancel tax. Council tax. Tax. Tax on tax. Taxable non deductable tax paid at 22.5% on the first 5% of all non deducatable VAT tax deductable allowances on your tax. Bulbs out. Reels missing. Sticky buttons. Machine missing. Machines in toilets in Blackpool Pleasure Beach. Coin mech alarms. Strim alarms and low hopper levels indicating criminal activity and so muntlings only play pounds not notes. Dead machines. Hopper popper jammers. Gob stoppers. Hopper croppers. Roy Cropper. Roy and Hayley. Hale and Pace. Too pacey. Cagney and Lacey. Laces that come undone. Done to a Tee. Golden Tee machines that take the place of fruit machines. Machines that sell cold coffee. Jon Coffee. The Green mile. Miles of smiles. Miles Tiles. Cream for Piles. Anusol. Costa Del Sol. Sold lots of tacky cash in Christmas books. Book in time for next Christmas. Early bookings. Sent off. Red card. Christmas Cards. Playing cards. Out draws. Bad draws. Droopey draws. Missed draws. Redraws. Ralph's Cartoon Club. Club biscuits. Club machines. Club club club a club where people club chocolate biscuits to death. Club club club. Club club club club a club machine based on club club club. Club club club club club a club where people talk about club club club club and who has won the jackpot on club club club club. People who moan about reading all this. Woohahahha...Rolf's cartoon club.

Sorry what was the question again?
@_!!

#43 Geddy

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 11:29 AM

If it is classed as income then you pay income tax on it - simple as that.

#44 shaun2097

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 12:41 PM

lol "NudgeMan" Excellent rant!!! Loved every word
Former Fruit Machine Engineer.<br /><br /> 1988-2004.

#45 GaryChandler

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 12:48 PM

Well done Nudgeman!

It took 5 pages for somebody to actually answer the question!

#46 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 12:56 PM

Ok so its worth reading all that random bollocks?

#47 spa

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 01:10 PM

If it is classed as income then you pay income tax on it - simple as that.



Problem with that would be everone who lost would have something else to set against thier books!

Also i'm guessing the amount of moeny spend by any pro player is a fair bit! £1000s in petrol throughout the year, food, drink, lol, even the £10,000 for that L33t MT :D

With no record at all of earnings, not only could they say they've won £15,000 (when it's closer to £40,000 say) but you could ofset so much against it you could squeeze even more back in a tax return :)

Pint of stella mate (or OJ) and can I have a receipt for that! :D

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#48 alfie09

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:07 PM

why are you dragging my name into this alth?....

#49 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:09 PM

Cos I knew you could not resist defending your arsehole mate thank you for proving me right.

#50 alfie09

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:11 PM

hows asking why ure dragging me into a convo defending anyone, if i wanted to comment on the subject i would have done!...

if ure that desperate for a chat just ask;)

#51 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:16 PM

Christ did you bunk off from the same school as Gary Chandler?

#52 alfie09

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:18 PM

yep.......... next daft question

#53 Geddy

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:27 PM

Alth it is the School Holidays you daft twat :D

#54 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:27 PM

Well club together and get that dictionary out of your next win there is a good lad.

#55 alfie09

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 03:59 PM

ahh, the old "you can't spell dig", yawn.....now who is posting crap for the sake of it?

#56 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 04:03 PM

When you get your arse handed to you time and time again and resort to having to have a go at my sig in an attempt to get the rest of the Ant Hill Mob to leap to your defence what in f***s blue blazes do you expect?

#57 GaryChandler

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 05:13 PM

Alth your the most boring #@#@#@#, i hope you havent got kids i would feel sorry for them.

#58 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 05:19 PM

More insults and you accuse me of being the boring one.

#59 GaryChandler

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 05:23 PM

What so saying i didn't go to school is not your attempting to insult me then?!?!?!

I bet you aint even got a misses av you alth?

#60 Guest_altharic_*

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Posted 28 December 2007 - 05:31 PM

What the f*** has the fact whether I have or have not got a girlfriend have to do with well..... f*** all really? Is that an attempt at wit on your part or are you just attempting some form of random insult because of your lack of dictation skills?




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