28 replies to this topic

[martin1980]

OK Guys & Gals (no I am not jimmy saville)

After seeing the interesting post based on peoples top fove fruities I would like to hear people worst 5 ever - based on a number of things, money lost, shitty gameplay, no wins offered, just generally machines that if you see them - you feel like smashing the nearest persons head through the top glass :twisted:

Mine are, - MOST EVIL FIRST :evil:

1) Club Roller Coaster (I know this is a classic and has great gameplay - but this is purely based on personal experience)

When I was 17 I was at a family party and had about £100 on me at the time, so after a few drinks I wonder downstairs form the function room and spot a £200 JP CRC!!! Great I thought...

1st board - 1st press ride closed - £30 later... 2nd board first press question mark... (RIDE CLOSED)

£30 later... get to the question mark before top feature... (guess what I hit.... LAST RIDE = £1.60)

so I am now very unhappy as things continue along these lines for the whole £100 - when I kick the machine and call it every *&**$($)%^( under the sun, as I walk away I can see an old bag coming towards me clutching a £1 coin...

so I turn around to see her just manage to put this quid in the machine - to my surprise on the board she gets first press...

squinting at the start button for about 3 minutes she decides to press it and to my JOY it lands on the question mark... again another few minutes squinting at every button on the machine and she presses start and gets last ride... chuckling to myself I am thinking whether she is going to get £1.60 or 1 winspin... but this old granny hits 16 NUDGES!!! and gets 4 ducks!!! YES THE CASHPOT!!!!! - so she is now still pressing the start button and she does'nt even know she has won as she is trying to put more money in the F**KING THING!!! I just walk off in pure hatred disgust at this frail old bag who has just won my money!!!!

ROLLER COASTER I HATE YOU!!!!

2) Club Fruits U Sir - this should be incinerated every single one ever released.

3) Super BlackJack (New Global £250 JP version) I once saw £800 go in it without winning one gamble on the high lo card track at the top = and no JP at the end.

4) Happy Fruits - Pure Evil in a low tech cabinet.

5) Side Winder - takes between £7 - £10 to get on the board and then 2 presses before GAME OVER. - or if you are lucky you might land on a question mark... hey its more game play (gives you an extra press to hit game over yourself)


I hope no-one has had such a horrid experience as myself on Roller Coaster. It would be nice to hear your worst 5 lists ever.

Cheers Guys.

Martin

[hinchy]

Mainly club machines for me as thats what i tended to play

1. Club Rollercoaster - yes I hate this machine aswell, it replaced my beloved Public Enemy n1 at my local club and hammered me for the 2 years it was in - I mean come on, big money shooting gallery wich would come around say once every £200 put in and give a £2 repeater

2.Count yer cash and clones - there was a real glut of these machines around a couple of years ago, quite entertaining but would never offer anything over £10 and cost a fortune to get the jackpot - watch as you build the nudge colum up to 12-16 nudges for a £2 win or take the feature below the jackpot to get £7 aargh

3.Club luckystrike / Calamari - maybe a contraversial one this but its basically a £40 machine with a £250 jackpot tagged on the end. The feature is almost pointless as u cant win anything over £40 and the only way to win is to keep your finger pressed on the turbo gamble button and hope it goes to the top - wow

4 Club Adders and ladders - again a pointless feature with no chance of winning anything big - get to the top and your awarded £20 with a restart chance - wow. Only hope is for something good to just drop in.

5. Club Crazy Fruits - another contreversial one this - its got good graphics and sounds and is a popular machine but i cant stand any machine that forces you to collect. Superboard up to £190 and bins u out on a £25 spin a win after £500 in -ouch

[wubbs]

Never get a chance to play club machines,so mine are all normal ones

1-Line Up remake-awful machine,sound,playabilty etc nothing like original.Was this even Barcrest?

2-Hokey Pokey-Party Time wannabee which looks and plays awful.

3-Give Us A Break-put £160 in it and still showed no signs of paying-this was £10 version too.

4-Psycho Cash Beast-I am a casual player and I struggle to get anything from this machine,and any I play always have lots of lamps out.

5-Crazy Fruits-just hate that style of "fruit"on the reels.

Anyone remember a machine from 5 years ago where the feature was a Greyhound race,you choose 1 of 3 dogs.It was great!

Cheers

[duplu]

Dont' play many, if any, machines these days :

1. Dosh 'n' Pecks - Utter crap, blocks at every given opportunity and on casual play you're loucky to get more than a £4 win. Play to force it and it will take you for a fortune.
2. Psycho Cash Beast and variants
3. Any Bar-X machine - what is the point?
4. Crazy Fruits - That bloody annoying sound! And no we don't emulate it, thank god!!
5. Royal Roulette - Tried to force this once and got killed 15 times on the 2nd to top feature. Eventually took it and it gave me £15 then sent me straight back in again for another £10 - Why not just give me the JP I forced for in the first place?

[Richard]

ok interesting one..

1)italian job club... this must be THE worst machine ever made, (although you must discount the old superhold trick), it was in several clubs I knew and NEVER payed the jp in months, I've previously tried to force it, and its resulted in £800 in for a machine STILL not offereing over £30ish wins, I mean does it EVER EVER go over them to jp, I f*****g doubt it. The boards if not absolutely pumped by someone beforehand will BLOCK at £3, you wont be able to get more than this, and it will also block features very low, say 3 superblasts ( either 1,2 or £3 ), if you are so lucky to get teh superboard, you "might" get £4.

2) club 21 ( maygay )... ughughugh what utter tripe, does it ever pay the jp? put many a few ton in it, and if your really really lucky you "MIGHT" get offered 90ish on the gamble only for it to then lose and then not come back at all. Club bj ( global ), and ALL clones of this machines are a nightmare too.

3) bankroller club ( barcrest )... always hated the machine, so hard to get a pot out of, the gameplay was alright though, and once you stop trying to force it , its not that bad. Another similar machine costa del cash is pretty similar in the "crap" scale

4) circus circus ( barcrest lo-tech club - that red/blue streak one )... had a few of these at casinos I used to go to, anyway never actually managed to get the jp, basically its the same as the £25jp one but the red streak "can" well in theory carry on to £1000 ( the jp symbols on the top reels are still £25, as are the red7's on the bottom ) basically if u get the red streak and it doesnt start with lions ( £25 ) you dont even get more than £50, this happens 99% of the time, and since the red streak costs about £3-400 sometimes, I just think its awful value. I did once get £850 from the blue streak which was rather odd, but overall terrible machine.

5) heartbreak hotel ( global club ).. just awful, ill leave it at that....

[Bencrest]

OK, I know I posted a worst 5 machines in the 'Best 5 machines' thread, but I'll post another set here :

5) Diggers Delight by Global [I think], I only played this on 3 occasions, and from what I remember, it was £25 with a 10p hopper?! Anyway, rarely got more than £1 from a board, and looked seriously old and cheap for a £25 machine. They could have at least put SOME effort into making it look like a fruit machine rather than a wheelie bin. Mind you, being a rebuild, it could well have been based on some 1980s BFM cab or something like that I guess As I didn't play it for more than 3 times, and only staked a couple of quid each time, I won't give it the honour of being my number 1

4) Big Cheese / Top Dog / Super Star / Hi Flyer. All 4 of these were Barcrests attempts at copying Bell Fruits stupid bloody 16 nudges for £1.20, hopelessly blocked boards at £2 repeaters, and pointless Super Trails. I'll go into more depth with the BFM versions, but I really thought that Barcrest had lost their way with these piles of sh**e....and you know what? They had

3) Happy Fruits / Crazy Fruit Down Under [BFM] - weird machines these. Trail is 1>6 with 7 + being a fruit win, which from memory you can hi-lo gamble. No bonus on any number 1>6. I knew this machine would be useless before I even went on it, when BFM said that it was aimed at 'lapsed players, or infrequent players'. That basically means no gameplay, just keep spinning until oranges fall in, and then take them. The Hi-Lo was far too vicious, normally killing on the £1.20 > £1.60 gamble, any I think only once for me going to £10. It did have an IM, which I did manage to get £75 from before, but you can't make up for appaling gameplay by going red every so often.

2) Count Yer Cash [MAZOOMA], Gold Digger, Royle Banker, Jackpot Junction and The Hulk [BFM]. For reasons as to why I hate these, have a look at number 4). I mean, as somebody who used to have a Spiker the Biker addiction [and hence has one next to his fishtank ], I know EXACTLY how a Super Board should play. Which isn't - IMHO - getting 3 heads, and only getting 2 nudges from the Super Board. I mean, look at Spiker, the Super Trail [same thing, different name], will give normally quite a few feature upgrades [which make Pound Run normally give £6>£10, and thats only the 2nd feature up!], cash repeat chances, and feature and cash additions.

Also, Spiker has a a nicer profile. Not every board is blocked at £2 ala Jackpot Junction, which blocks all boards at £2 and then drops £50>£75. And Jackpot Junction and clones can give you 3 ?s in a row. On a GOOD machine, like Spiker, once you survive a ? mark it is IMPOSSIBLE for the next spin to kill you [unless you Move back 3 onto a Lose or move back 3/add again onto a ? mark]. Only good thing about them is that when the streak they partially make up for all of crap they've given you before.

1) Hmmm.... what is the WORST machine I can think of..... but I'm going to stick with my previous choice of £5 Three Player Monopoly by Mazooma. About as much fun and playability as trying to dig your eyes out with rusty hooks. I put £50 into a £5 machine, and wound up with £7. Maybe it was my fault for pushing for the Super Board, but to be honest, when there was only ONE nudge win offered from that £50 that held [£1 surprisingly], it seemed like it was worth trying to get it. Oh, and the £5 was a JP that just rolled in.

I then took that £7 and put it in on Autoplay, pulled up an ashtray, and got ready for some 'entertainment'. Well, after about 1 minute, my £7 had become £10, when a JP held for me . I then thought - maybe if £7 can become £10, that £10 could become £15?. Not a hope in hell. Don't think it offered one hold or nudge, just kept spinning my 10ps away . After that experience I decided never to play a Lo-Tech ever again. I bet that Party Time can be equally nasty but I can't put it on here as I haven't actually played one

[RB]

1. any lo tech
2. any Global Machine
3. any £25 Jpm
4. any Vivid............<------ Pet hate (evil machines round here)
5. any swp.........most nights i cant stand let alone see the screen.

[Rick E]

1.Homers meltdown. This was one of the first machines i had ever played on and it was a £5 reapeter and i ended up putting £19 in it. Some man came along and put 50p in it and got reapeter three times which is just my *^%$£"! luck. :?
2. Most of the maygay machines ever made especially the simpson ones.
3.Jpm machines are crap
4.Monty python I !"£"£"$"" hate that machine its a piece of "££$!.
5.The worst macihne ever crated has to be Beaver Las Vegas i watced some one put £45 in a £5 reapter and he had no money left so he punched it and then i thought i was in luck so i put in about £10 and i still didnt win anyhtin i was proper "£!$£%$ off.

[Bencrest]

1.Homers meltdown. This was one of the first machines i had ever played on and it was a £5 reapeter and i ended up putting £19 in it. Some man came along and put 50p in it and got reapeter three times which is just my *^%$£"! luck. :?
2. Most of the maygay machines ever made especially the simpson ones.
3.Jpm machines are crap
4.Monty python I !"£"£"$"" hate that machine its a piece of "££$!.
5.The worst macihne ever crated has to be Beaver Las Vegas i watced some one put £45 in a £5 reapter and he had no money left so he punched it and then i thought i was in luck so i put in about £10 and i still didnt win anyhtin i was proper "£!$£%$ off.

Well, we are all entitled to out opinions, but I'd have to say that 3 of those are easily in my top 10, and the other 2 aren't that bad!

4. any Vivid............<------ Pet hate (evil machines round here)

I forgot to add Pie Factory, it can go in 6th place on my list

BarcrestBenito

[Gazeyre1966]

Aaah!! Now for some fun!!!

1) Bank Note by Ace £4 JP (or for that matter any other crappy mid to late 80's machine made by this Company with question marks and microdots. I mean, what was the bloody point? I owned said machine around 7 years ago and played it to death. My highest win in 2 years playing was £9...and even then it took it all back again.

2) Del's Millions - Wasted a fortune on this one. Even now on the emulator I can't get it to pay. I think this just doesn't like me The original only fools with the 3 Robin Reliants to get feature was far better.

3) Take Two - Barcrest. If you haven't played this twister with 2 winlines then you must be too young 'cos otherwise it would be in everyone's bottom 5. Once stuck my head through the glass of this machine and had to have 20 stitches. It was worth every stitch!!!

4)Popeye - JPM. One word - Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!

5) Silver Ghost. Can't remember who made this but it was the first machine I ever played. I was 15 and on holiday in Woolacombe. I spent my entire holiday savings in 2 nights and didn't get to pull any talent 'cos I was left skint. Original Bar X clone that if I ever have the misfortune to come across again....will have no hesitation in getting more stitches.

[Irvster]

5. Money To Burn club
4. Adders And Ladders club
3. Club Crazy Fruits
2. Nudge Nudge Wink Wink
and the worst possible machines of all time have to be these multiplayer.lo-tech money guzzling lo-tech piles of shite that are absolutely everywhere with 1 person playin all 3 at the same time and thinkin they are gonna win a monkey out of em!!!!!!

[PJ]

...Line Up remake-awful machine,sound,playabilty etc nothing like original.Was this even Barcrest?...

Yes, unfortunately, if it's the 1988 one you're talking about, along with the Exchanges Unlimited remake about the same time...

...Anyone remember a machine from 5 years ago where the feature was a Greyhound race,you choose 1 of 3 dogs...

Is that the mid-80's BWB one where the tipster whistles at you with a 'hot tip'?

Or maybe, it's the one from about ten years ago, called Hot Dog, by JPM - get three bones in view to start the race, and you could only collect your prize if you were in the lead...

...italian job club...

What, as in 'you looka for work, or we stoppa ya dole'?...

Seriously though, when I was living in Rochester back in 1996/7, there was this totally dreadful machine in my local called 'Daily Sport', based on the 'news'paper! This was a total cockmaster of a machine which took £350 off me over a week, and never gave me the 3 newspapers for the £10 jackpot streak once!!!

I never noticed who the mfr was (it felt like a BFM of the time), and it was the only one I ever saw, so either they withdrew them sharpish after public outcry at similar daylight robbery the country over, or the Daily Sport had recovered from the result of dwindling sales at the expense of unsuspecting punters getting their wallets raped by a mechanical mugger set at a 30% payout...

--- EDIT ---

...I have roms and reel scans but am I f*** making them public...

Why not?... :-?

[Memap]

At 5: Well, clubbers seem to get a fair bit of voting in here - might as well add Costa Del Cash to the list

At 4:Rick picked out Homer's Meltdown. I'd change that and nominate only the £5 version - the £15 version is far more playable when you know what you're doing.

At 3: The one in Nobles in Manchester in the 90s where some c*** had pissed in the coin tray. First time ever I have left a 20p piece where it was.

At 2: Bangin' Away: Frenzy was the only acceptable clone of Psycho Cash Beast

At 1: Eliminator: For being MPU5 and therefore not available on MFME. Otherwise it would be my No 1 best.

[Bencrest]

...I have roms and reel scans but am I f*** making them public...

Why not?... :-?

Oh, thats just Alth being Alth. Check him out on www.fruitforums.com , I guess you could call him a 'character'

Most people however call him a tw*t. Up to you if thats an A or an I I've blanked out

BarcrestBenito

[wubbs]

Or maybe, it's the one from about ten years ago, called Hot Dog, by JPM - get three bones in view to start the race, and you could only collect your prize if you were in the lead...

Thanks PJ,thats the one! Hotdog! Any emulation possibilities?

[ziggy]

I guess you can call any fruit machine that skins your cheeks the " worst fruity ever ect "

I list these machines as ones that i have had the misfortune to play at the " wrong " time !! ...........


1st. Ready to rock , shouldn't have. was full and i tried to " force it ".£200 later..... left with two jp's.If only i have known , blah , blah , blah.....

2nd, Cant remember all their names but i'll say any lo-tech.

3rd, Anyone remember Ace's Poundstrecher ? There was one called Sterling that was the same.£4 jp thing at the fair.Spent b.f.h on this ( bus fare home ) and walked 10 miles home.

4th, Jewel in the crown, always came off this with lighter pockets.

5th, I once put over £50 in Haunted house( project game from the early nineties ) when i should have bought a Nintendo game, so that gets a mention too.

Did i mention i also hate Globals ?

[PJ]

...Hotdog! Any emulation possibilities?

Probably not, as it used a pre-Impact tech, possibly MPS2 like the two Popeye's, Hagar, Fairground, etc

BTW, what tech was Eachway Shuffle, MPS1? I know FrogHop, PacMan, RoadRunner, etc were System80, but EWS looks more ancient than those...

[lincs leisure R us]

I Am Sure Eachway Shuffle Was On The Early System 80 Processor.

I Remember The PCB Board Was Behind The Reel Unit.

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markus