Jump to content


Photo
* * * * - 8 votes

Old joke (it made me giggle)


  • Please log in to reply
1692 replies to this topic

#1681 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 03 September 2017 - 08:43 PM

"It's a boy!" I shouted tears rolling down my face "I don't believe it. A boy!"

It was at that moment I decided I'd never visit Thailand again.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1682 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 05 September 2017 - 06:32 AM

Wife walked into the bedroom to find me pulling of my boxers.

She then called me a sick bastard and reported me to the RSPCA.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1683 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 06 September 2017 - 08:36 AM

Facebook is a bit like checking your underwear after a fart,

most likely there's nothing new, and if there is, it's probably shit.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1684 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 06 September 2017 - 07:53 PM

Told the Mrs that I don't want to go to an 80's fancy dress party. But she remains adamant.


My friend Gav died from heartburn this morning. I can't believe Gaviscon.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1685 hitthesix

hitthesix

    Layout Designer

  • Layout Creator
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 3135 posts

Posted 07 September 2017 - 11:58 AM

The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up, 

 

 

I said "Do you get my drift?"



#1686 ricardo de ponsa

ricardo de ponsa

    The Wallpaper

  • Regulars
  • 636 posts

Posted 07 September 2017 - 06:45 PM

.

Attached Files


For every silver lining, there's a cloud.


#1687 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 07 September 2017 - 09:49 PM

My wife accused me of being a transvestite. So I packed her things and left.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1688 hitthesix

hitthesix

    Layout Designer

  • Layout Creator
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 3135 posts

Posted 07 September 2017 - 09:59 PM

I bought some HP sauce the other day.

 

It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years.



#1689 cashbox1

cashbox1

    Make it idiot proof, and someone will make a better idiot.

  • Layout Creator
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 2072 posts

Posted 07 September 2017 - 11:07 PM

just been cured of my addiction to singing "the lion sleeps tonight",i`m not going to get complacent about it though, i know its return is only a whim away a whim away :D


ye know too much....


#1690 hitthesix

hitthesix

    Layout Designer

  • Layout Creator
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 3135 posts

Posted 08 September 2017 - 07:47 AM

My wife had a go at me last night. She said 'You'll drive me to my grave'.

 

 

I had the car out in thirty seconds.



#1691 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 08 September 2017 - 09:50 AM

Nearly got the sack from my job at a well known supermarket when an old lady at the cashpoint said she wanted to check her balance so I pushed her over. Then someone asked where our specials were and I told them they collect the trolly's.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1692 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 10 September 2017 - 08:30 PM

Told my friend that a Do it yourself sex change was a bad idea.

Well I must say he actually pulled it off.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?

#1693 bri365

bri365

    Master Joker

  • Regulars
  • 476 posts

Posted 13 September 2017 - 07:58 PM

How do you milk sheep?

You release a new iphone and charge them a grand for it.


If you killed your parents would you be an orphan?




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users