A bloke gets a job at the local store. On the first day he turns up early, all enthusiastic and eager to impress. The manager says, 'OK John, I'm going to start you off behind the till. Watch me for a few minutes, and I'll show you how it's done!'
The manager stands behind the desk, and his new employee looks on intently as a guy walks in.
'Hi there Sir, how may I be of assistance?' says the manager, trying to set a good example.
'I'd like a packet of grass-seeds please', the customer replies.
Manager: There you go sir, one pack of grass seeds at 59p, and here's your lawn-mower...
Customer: You what?
Manager: Your lawn-mower sir....
Customer: What do I need that for?
Manager: Well sir, when you plant the seeds you'll have grass in a few weeks and you'll need the lawn-mower to mow the grass. Simple. Pay me £5 a week for 10 weeks and it's yours...
Customer: Oh yes, I didn't think of that, thanks...
And the customer walks out really happy.
Manager: There you go John, THAT is how it's done, learn from the master (etc). Go on, you serve the next customer...
John stands at the counter for a minute, and then another bloke walks in.
Customer#2: Can I have a packet of tampons please?
John: Yes certainly sir, [reaches under the counter and produces a box of jam-rags, this shop has everything...] one pack of tampons, that'll be £1.20...and here's your lawn-mower...
[The manager stands in disbelief, then turns away, his head in his hands...]
Customer#2: What do I want a lawn-mower for, you dipshit?
John: Well sir, it looks like your weekend's fucked, so you might as well cut the grass...
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Watch out! There's a SIG thief about...
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